« Home | Dude quit licking my eye » | Oh, I forgot. Whats new, right? I do that alot. So... » | catchy operational code word... Mag-Neato » | To what’s her name » | Just in case you forgot » | Oh, kats are cool too » | OHHHHHHHHHH MY GOD! » | Guess what happened on the way too…….. » | Been awhile, but I remember the words, do you? » | C-SPAN2……….. Say what dude? » 

08 June 2006 

Greetings my pets

It is I the wise and all knowing one…………

The Great Lizard

It has come to my attention that some of my pets fear for their safety. This is not good. I provide my pets with a safe and secure home. So to put your minds at ease I shall tell you how I do this.

In case of fire I have installed a state of the art system. Some of you have heard her voice “There is a fire get out now, use the stairs”. (OK she does not say that but when she speaks you should listen)

For small fires I have placed these canisters that are called “FIRE EXTINGUISHER” strategically place for your use. I have attached a map of their location for your review. Know them LOVE them they are here for you.

As for those nasty paper cuts I have provided a first aid kit. You all have seen it; I have placed it on top of your refrigerated food supply.

I tell you my pets I take your safety very seriously. If for any reason you feel unsafe talk to the wall..?

I take great pride in the welfare and care of all my pets. Do not fear. I am always here. As I have created the great internet (No Al Gore did not do it, I did)

“I am on the dirt frontage road to the internet thingy”

Take it slow and keep your head up. That way you can see the bullshit coming.
And don’t waste my time calling me a racist, cause I aren’t. So there!

Links to this post

Create a Link